Sunday, May 10, 2015

Mid-Year Report

[To the May business meeting of Freedom Friends Church]

People say that the second year of seminary is the hardest. Academically, this year was not as challenging as I expected, but it has been emotionally difficult. Many things in the culture had an impact on people in my program, including the Black Lives Matter movement responding to white privilege and police violence, and especially the scheduling and delay of Kelly Gissendaner’s execution (an inmate at Lee Arrendale State Prison, where I worked as a chaplain intern last year). I also withdrew from a class for the first time ever, because the professor was a bully and I felt like I wasn’t learning anything. 

I feel like an outsider here in a number of ways. It has been challenging for me to be the only Quaker at Candler, where I am frequently called on to educate people about the Religious Society of Friends and to represent Friends. In the Pacific Northwest, my politics seem pretty moderate; here, people consider me extremely liberal. I miss the diversity of Friends in the Pacific Northwest and the ways Convergent Friends interact and worship together. 

I finished my contextual education at Atlanta Friends Meeting this spring. My main focus this past semester was on the meeting’s Gathered Meeting Retreat, which took place the last weekend of March. The theme was “How Friends Worship.” Over the weekend, we tried various prayer practices, talked about the language we use for the divine, and shared about our experiences in unprogrammed worship. On Sunday morning, we had semi-programmed worship, Bible reading in the manner of Ohio Yearly Meeting Conservative Friends, and unprogrammed worship. I was glad to have the opportunity to lead this retreat; it felt like a good use of my gifts. 

One of the purposes of seminary is to make students confront their own issues and unhealthy patterns. Over the winter, I began seeing a new therapist who has both an MDiv and a Ph.D from Emory---a good fit for me right now. She and I did good work together, particularly around anxiety, sexuality, and attachment. I have continued to see my spiritual director monthly, and a third person joined my anchoring committee. I have a strong support system, which is reassuring for me. 

Looking ahead to next year, there are a number of things I am excited about. I agreed to serve on the board of trustees for Friends Journal, and decided to step down from the Sacred Worth executive board to make time for that new commitment. My MDiv thesis proposal was approved: I will be writing about how women ministers’ bodies are seen as both threatening and threatened. I also will be participating in Candler Advantage, which will provide me with an $8,000 grant and three credits for spending the summer working at First Friends Meeting in Greensboro, NC. I am excited to spend time in a programmed, FUM meeting, and I am looking forward to preaching and gaining experience in pastoral care and administration there. 

In some ways, it is hard to believe that I am two-thirds of my way through seminary, though in other ways it has felt very long. I am starting to think more about what I want to do after I am finished with school here, and hoping to find a place and a job where I can settle for a while. Thank you for your love and support.

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